Monday, 26 September 2011

My Nature...

I find it quite hard to write about personal things, but I am going to try something different, as it is birthday season in my family and turning new leaves and what not, so here goes.  Rather than a rebuttal about a woman's nature to my previous post, I am instead going to write my personal opinion of my sex and relationship nature seeing as my readers are mostly female it will be easier than generalizing.

It took me quite a few years to realize that my ability to change my mind and views about relationships and sex was not necessarily a bad thing.  I always thought that changing my mind made me appear wishy washy, and under confident.  This came out in both long term and short term interactions with men.  However, after open minded reading of sex at dawn I finally came to an understanding and appreciation of how this can be turned into a real gift.  Woman really do have a sexual power over men.  We have multiple orgasms, and more importantly the ability to be turned on by a vast array of variety.  This is a concept that took me a long time to figure out that the power inside does not make me "slutty".  Instead makes me a healthy and well rounded individual. 

It is not easy to stand up as a woman and proudly say that "I love sex" and that I do not necessarily want to end up sleeping with the exact same man day in and day out for the rest of my life.  This became especially clear to me when it dawned on me just how depressing the lives are of the middle aged married couple.  The kids move out and boom, rather than doing something to solve or spice up the marriage, the only option is divorce.  Boredom leads to idle hands and over active imaginations.  

To be clear, I am not in any way promiscuous, not that that should add or subtract any weight from the point I want to get across.  But I am aware of that strong sexual urge that sometimes exists for someone outside of your partner.  And how dare society say that's a bad thing. If safety comes first and you are honest with your partner this is only an urge and should not mean that there is any less stability or security when you get home.  The idea that religion has placed on so many people that sex leads to marriage or vice versa is B.S.  The number of unhappy couples out there because of religion, and/or society forcing them to stay together is enough that I have brought it up numerous times in previous blogs.

I love getting dressed up and feeling sexy for both my man, as well as other men.  Turning heads of other men and sometimes women, is a great feeling.  Yet I recently read a Dear Ann letter written by a reader  that was so unhappy that her husband was even looking at other woman that she was ready to threaten divorce.  What made this story so notable to me, is that the respondent actually sided with the woman and told her that she was right to think that mere looks were cheating and she should tell her husband that if he doesn't stop she would leave him.  Yes putting boundaries is very important in a relationship, but who wants to live in a society that is going backwards in time?  If a man cannot even look at other woman isn't that a parallel to the corsets, or ankle and wrist covered clothing woman needed to wear not even less than 150 year ago?


In getting back to writing about me, I look all the time.  I am very aware of my surroundings and I enjoy flirting thoroughly.  I also take a lot of pride when my man gets flirted with, that he is desirable to other woman.  And I am completely OK with this and it can actually be a turn-on.  I am learning to use my ever changing sexual turn ons as a positive addition to my personality rather than a negative.  This hasn't always been easy, and I stumble every now and then, but overall the experiences both good and not so good make up who I am.  Sex is fantastic and confidence makes it even better.

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