Friday, 20 January 2012

Sexual Compatibility

What does your sex life really mean to you and your relationship?  There are a few schools of thought out there that state sexual compatibility is the ultimate test of a good and long lasting relationship.  Without a healthy sex life, you will be missing out on some of the greatest things a relationship has to offer.  Is it as I have written before just sex? Or as a few people have said as you get older, sex will fizzle out and what really counts is what you have left when the sex is gone.  Sex is gone? Or Limited?  Oh please oh please no!

When I was in my first serious long term relationship, my mother asked me, are we compatible in bed and does he get me off.  I may be paraphrasing her exact vocabulary, but the bottom line is that I was raised to believe that sex was important.  And I, to this day completely agree with this wisdom.  Too often when I am in a sour mood, the endorphins that I receive from sex will flip my frown upside down.  Sexuality is a driving force in my emotional serenity, both writing about it, and in experiencing it.  There is freedom, and happiness in embracing my sexual drive.

So often I see and hear men and women complain about lack of sex, or the desire for it to just be over.  Ever hear, “he just won’t cum fast enough”, or “he cum’s sooner than I can get off”, or “I just don’t think she enjoys sex”.  Pure heartbreak on this end whenever I hear these words spoken.   In my experience, incompatibility in the sack will result in incompatibility in the relationship.  Why?  Quite simply, sex is my stress relief, my self esteem boost, and overall I just enjoy sharing that intimacy with my partner.  The afterwards glow, and the sexed up hair is a nice bonus too.

I do think there are many circumstances that do need to be discussed to ensure that both partners are fulfilled in the bedroom.  Without communication everything is doomed for failure.  Don’t be ashamed if two people just don’t quite mesh after the communication is over, it’s natural, and there are so many people and fetishes, and variety that yes, someone will fit you.  More than fit you, someone will expand your horizons and feel comfortable to try new experiences with you too. 

Bottom line is that sexual chemistry is very important to me.  And I would wish sexual success on all those that read my blog and want to or do achieve this on a regular basis.  Whatever you decide when it comes to monogamy, Open, Poly or any multitude of relationship types out there that you and your partner(s) are fulfilled. 

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