Thursday, 13 September 2012

Dating Is Different When You Are 20


I was talking to a girl in her young twenties a few weekends ago with whom I went camping with.  We were wistfully wishing for a shower and other fine luxuries that we were without during our three night stint in tent.  She mentioned how badly she wanted to wash her hair and I wished I could shave my legs.  She laughed at this and said that even with shaving as an option she rarely shaves her legs although her boyfriend wishes that she would more often.  My man hugged me and commented on how I am almost always silky smooth and said he realized hearing that just how grateful he is about that extra effort I go through.

Here is the thing about this, when I really reflected on the whole scenario I realized that I used to be this girl.  In my first long term relationship, that was in my early 20’s I did not get dressed up, did not shave regularly or paint my toe nails.  I had this, take me as I am kinda mentality, that evolved into, a love me even though I put absolutely no effort into my appearance take on things.  After having this conversation with this young woman it really made me realize that these are some of the trappings of youth and relationships.  I can clearly see now how some woman who marry young and perhaps even having their children young lose sight of all those little things.  Couples become complacent and too easily stop putting effort into their appearances.

She will figure out in time that rebelling against someone that you love makes things difficult.  If your partner asks you to shave your legs, you do it because you love them and it makes them happy.  But you always ask for something in return.  Never just give in and become that doormat who lives to please, but rather share your turn ons and turn offs with your partner.  It makes it so much easier to get along and communicate.  As well it can even be a mutual benefit as turning on your partner can make you turned on, starting a pleasure cycle. 

The things I now do for my partners that I was just plain lazy and stubborn about with my first love just really proves to me the juvenile nature of dating when we are younger.  These are lessons that should be learned, and I am very happy I grew out of this childish tendency.  And I would hazard a guess that my partners appreciate these little things two.

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