When I had the opportunity last summer, well to be accurate, when I created the opportunity last summer to hook up with two guys at the same time, I was over the moon. It was something I had wanted to do for a long time, and after the weeks of planning and hard work setting it up, well I am still a little speechless over how well it turned out. I was diligent in my planning, and I screened the participants thoroughly and assessed my risks versus pleasure. I took careful care of my body before and after to ensure I minimized any foreseen physical risks. You cannot 100% eliminate all risk, but you can certainly ask questions and be as informed as possible about the pros and cons.
There is one aspect though that I did not even consider in the cons section and have only been made aware of it over 6 months later. And that is ‘blood is in you to give’, unless of course you engage in high risk sexual activity. Any and all male to male contact, even with a condom, is considered a high risk activity for the risk of HIV/AIDS, and therefore gay men are ineligible to give blood. Also females who have any sexual contact with a partner who has had previous male to male contact are temporarily deferred from giving blood. My little fantasy had the unforeseen potential to temporarily blacklist me from helping others by giving blood and could have potentially blacklisted the gentlemen who were right along with me had they engaged in any contact with each other and not just maintain all their amazing focus on me...
This makes me very angry, to the point that I can pointedly say that law is created out of hate and fear and not education. All the blood donated is tested and screened, so if it is clear of disease why should it not be used? Many others are outraged about this as well, thus there is a change that is currently being proposed. And that is if you do not have any male to male contact for a minimum of 5 years then you may be eligible to donate. However it still means that gay men are not allowed to donate, even if they have been completely monogamous with the same partner for over 5 years. The risks of transmitting AIDS/HIV is deemed too high to potentially allow into the public, even if it was a matter of life and death.
Please see below for a direct quote from Canadian Blood Services;
3. HIV High Risk Activities:
There are a number of high-risk activities for acquiring HIV/AIDS that can indefinitely defer people from giving blood. People who have taken money or drugs for sex, since 1977 cannot give blood.
All men who have had sex with another man, even once, since 1977 are indefinitely deferred. This is based on current scientific knowledge and statistical information that shows that men who have had sex with other men are at greater risk for HIV/AIDS infection than other people.
Intravenous use of illegal street drugs/narcotics also constitutes a HIV high risk activity and results in indefinite deferral.
8. HIV High Risk Activities
Being the sexual partner of someone who has participated in high risk activities (other than the sexual partner of someone who has tested positive for HIV) will result in a temporary deferral.