With more and more frequency, I have been asked for dating advice. I love giving dating, relationship and sex advice. It is a passion I have had for years, and writing this blog allows me the freedom to say what I feel needs to be said and explore many conflicts I have found in the societies we live in. There is a commonality to all advice that I give. If you are not happy with yourself, you cannot be happy with someone else. It is so basic and simple in concept, and yet really difficult to get through to many people. The standard, you need to be in a good place to date seems to fall on deaf ears, or perhaps is too much of a challenge for many out there, I know I have struggled with a bit in recent months.
I am going to share with you a few items that I hope will help you as much as they have helped me. The first thing is to write down all the things you like about yourself, followed by all the things you love about yourself. Take 15 minutes and fill a page with every positive you know to be true, or even things that you are so proud you have improved about yourself. After you have done this, take a highlighter and place emphasis on every item on that list that makes you unique, and stand out. Take a few minutes to really acknowledge that you have strengths and feel some pride when doing this. These highlighted items are things you should be sharing with those around you. These are the stories you should be telling, and the passions you should be chasing. These things that make you an individual, and what’s more are what make you interesting, which goes hand in hand with confidence. The resulting list will be the fundamentals that allow you to exist with yourself. And the only way to live with anyone else, is to first live with yourself. To love yourself, and take pride in the things that set you apart.
I have a reading list on this blog, that I update regularly. It is a compilation of the material that has added something important to how I view the world around me, specifically in how people interact with each other. Reading and writing are my way of constantly improving myself, and playing to my strengths. It is my uniqueness, passion and what fuels me day in and day out. I found myself through my writing. For some it is sports, others arts, design, music, public speaking, teaching, animals, comedy, and the list could go on for eternity. I love helping through the mysteries of the dating world, relationships and even sex, and of course I love exploring all these things for myself. But I had to find out what made me the best I am for myself. No person could tell me, or teach me what really keeps me up at night. Once you find yourself, everything else can truly follow. There is no way around it. No shortcuts and no exceptions. You must love yourself, before anything can follow. Once accomplished, feel free to write to me with any and all questions as I love hearing from you.